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Mom’s On Their Own To Do List? Come on…..

May 4th, 2010

Wow I have talked to a lot of moms lately and they are all SO busy!  How can they be so busy?  Well, whether they have a full time job or not they are all juggling the kids, the chores, and the errands.   Add the job thing into the mix and there is even more of a struggle.  Moms are so busy they do not have time to do much for themselves.  Many moms feel this is the way it is supposed to be too.  We are living in that Martyr Kingdom that we do all for others and leave ourselves last  on the list.  Hmmm we all know we never get through our to do list either so we never get to attend to ourselves.  Add this up day after day and guess where our energy level is at?  You are right – at the bottom of the drain. 

What can we do about this?  Well there are a couple things.  Decide right now one thing that you can do for your self.    I went and got a pedicure.  Other moms love to take bubble baths.  What is your one thing that would make you feel amazing if you could do it.  Pick one of these things every week NO MATTER WHAT. 

There is a great benefit that you will begin to feel after a couple weeks.  You will find that you are adding energy into your energy bank account.  You will have more energy for your kids, your chores, your errands and your life.  It is amazing how the air in the house changes when you feel good and energized!  So, for Mother’s Day ask for something that would make you feel energized!

As a bonus, we are hosting a seminar called Take Your Energy Back this Thursday at 10:30 am central.  Just click here to register.  

Happy Mother’s Day!

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Do You Have Faith?

April 26th, 2010

I am coaching a mastermind group on FAITH today.  It really gets me thinking about things I have in my life that I have received. 

  • How did I get them? 
  • How did I know to keep working towards these goals without any knowledge whether I would receive them or not? 
  • What was the difference between the things I have received or achieved and the things I didn’t? 

What do you think is the difference?

What have you achieved in your life?  What was your state of mind? 

“Faith is the starting point for everything you achieve in your life.  Faith is the basis of all ‘miracles’ and all mysteries which cannot be analyzed by the rules of science” Napoleon Hill. 

Think about the results you have in your life that you DON’T like.  What thoughts or faith have you been putting towards them?  Do you have enough money?  Did you have faith that the money would come to you?  Do you have a great relationship with your kids?  Did you think you WOULD have one? 

What is going on in your thoughts?  This is in total alignment with what you have going on in your present results.  Look at this picture on the right.  If you are on the bottom stair to success and you have an idea or a goal that will bring you to the top of the stairway – what is going to get you there?  Usually when we have a goal, we don’t know all the steps of how we are going to achieve it.   So, take the first step and Faith fills the rest!  Step up into faith and the physical steps to achieving your goal will be revealed to you in the perfect timing. 

MAY CHALLENGE:  Write down your goals that you would like to achieve by the end of May.  Repeat these goals out loud at least twice every day.  Begin to imagine having achieved them. 

Faith will get you there!

 

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Have You Ever Had ‘A Day’?

April 13th, 2010

I had a day yesterday and it wasn’t great.  I don’t know what was going on in my head.  I didn’t post my blog.  My to do list didn’t get done.  I felt bad and felt like I couldn’t do anything.  Any goals I had – forget it!  We all have these kind of days right?  I hope!?? Don’t you?   :|

How do we act around our kids on these days?  Our moods affect our kids very directly.  We have to be aware of this and remember our energy is picked up by everyone in our house.  If our kids started acting out on these days then don’t lash out on them.  Don’t add this to your list of what made your day go bad. 

Realize this is a direct cause of your mood and your energy. 

Give your kids some space.  One great thing you can do when this happens is to find something for both you and your kids to do together that you enjoy.  Begin to do it and you will feel the energy shift immediately in the room.  The smoke will clear and it will smell cleaner.

One more point about “our days”.  Our kids also have these “days.”  Realize that we all do.  We do not all fall into perfect alignment everyday of the year.  We have our moments and our days and so do our children.  The best thing you can do for your kids when you notice they are just in a mood is to talk to them.  Don’t react to their mood and get caught up in your movie of how they are supposed to treat you.  I know this isn’t easy.  Believe me!  Do it anyway!  Give them a hug and distract them by spending time with them either playing, talking, reading or just listening to them. 

I have so much gratitude for “my day” yesterday because my husband and my kids all gave ME that space that I needed to get it out of me so I can have a wonderful day today!  The day after is always so amazing!  :)

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You Can Take Your Relationship Back!

March 29th, 2010

I want to take you back for a moment.  Think back to when you first wanted to have kids.  Think about what was going through your head in those moments.  What goals did you have for your kids?  What did you want to do with them and for them?  What kind of relationship were you going to have with them?  Really remember all those feelings and pictures you had for their lives.

Now, look at today.  Many of us do not have the type of relationship with our kids that we first dreamed about because we lost it somehow along the way of life.  We lost all those pictures because we got busy with daily chores, jobs and stuff. 

I am here to tell you right now that you CAN get it all back. 

Start remembering all those wonderful goals and dreams you had for your kids when they were first born.  Get them back in the front of your mind right now.  If you have to write them down – do it.  Make them your goals again. Every word that comes out of your mouth should emulate what goals you have for them.  You were full of love when they were born – make sure your words are full of love now that they are teenagers.

As a parent, you are the biggest influence in your kids lives no matter how old they are!  I am partnering with you to make sure your influence is a GREAT one.  We are growing confident kids which are going to change the world!  Have fun taking your relationship back!

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Mother-Daughter Relationships Ugh!

March 22nd, 2010

When you think of a mother-daughter relationship most people say ugh!  There are so many moms that are struggling to have a better relationship with their daughters especially in their teenage years.  Moms just don’t know how to get through to their daughters.  Don’t forget there are two sides to every story!  Daughters feel like moms don’t listen and they don’t understand them at all. 

My daughter was almost embarrassed to tell her friends, while they were complaining about their moms, that we got along great.  She didn’t feel normal.  They were complaining all the time and she didn’t need too.  Now I might be patting myself on the back here but I have FOUND the secret decoder ring on how to have a great relationship with my daughter.  You are sooooo lucky because I am willing to share my secrets too! 

I would love to show you how easy it is to have that DREAM relationship with your daughter!  Would you do anything to have it?  Would you have less stress if you got along with your daugher?  Yes!  I know I do!  In fact my daughter is only 20 but we have been able to turn to each other for years when either one of us need to talk.  Do you want this too?

I will send you information on how to do this.  Just send me an email at julie@crazyamazinglife.com and put in the subject line – I WANT IT TOO!  The time is now to have that dream relationship with your daughter!

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It Takes Two to Argue!

March 15th, 2010

Picture this…our kids come home from school in a crabby, crabby mood.  They start talking back to us and all we did is ask them how their day was.  Do you have these moments in your home?  They shouldn’t talk to their parent’s disrespectful right?  They have to learn or they are going to get out of hand. 

I have a thought for you…. 

What if you let them vent (even if it is on you) and when they are done talking you say “Wow you didn’t have a good day at school did you?”  They will look at you very funny at first.  They may even become defensive. 

My rule is respond to them DON’T REACT. 

Don’t add any emotions to this conversation.  Give them the space to get it off their chest.  Then respond with a comment showing them that you support them and love them.  It takes two to argue and if you keep your emotions out of this picture then there will be no argument.  Their mood will disappear and they will feel more confident because you gave them the floor to vent and to listen to them. 

“But they can’t talk to me this way” you ask? 

You will find they will apologize all on their own.  Then they will give you a hug because you showed them you love them just by not reacting.  This helps boost their self confidence.  Give it a try and test it yourself!  I have done this hundreds of times with my kids and with other people at the stores or at work etc.  It works every time!  Happy testing!

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Want more peace at home? Start with YOU!

March 8th, 2010

I was at a couple different parties this past weekend and came across a mom that really loved her daughter.  BUT there was a problem – all I heard from her was everything her daughter was weak in.  She was really focusing so much energy and power to everything her daughter was doing wrong.  Please watch your words, your tones and your actions when you talk TO your kids and when you talk ABOUT your kids to others.  If you want your kids to respect you, if you want your kids to behave better, if you want your family to stop driving you crazy then the first place of change is with you!  I know this is a bit harsh but I had to figure it out too!  This is the hardest place yet the easiest place to make a change.  I created more peace in my home when I changed me.  Then my kids were respectful and happy. 

I challenge you to make your words, your actions and your tone to reflect the love you have for your kids this week.  We do love our kids.  I am not doubting this at all.  Sometimes we just stink at showing it or we were trained to show it in ways that defeat our goals.  So, everything that comes out of your lips and all the energy you place towards your kids this week is full of love and peace.  It starts with YOU!

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How Do We See Our Kids?

February 22nd, 2010

“Successful parents raising positive, drug-free kids need to see their kids as finished, competent, positive adults” Zig Ziglar. 

Many times we see our kids as just our kids.  That sounds reasonable – right?  But think about what goes through your head.  As I walk around the house sometimes, I see maybe some chores that aren’t finished, then I see a backpack where it shouldn’t be, then I see 3 water glasses on the kitchen sick from the same kid.  I start to see my kids for all the stuff they are not complying with at home.  Over time, this really distracts or should I say DISTORTS the image we have of our kids. 

 In the Family Mind Program, I really focus on the tools to switch our perception and see our kids with all the hopes and dreams we had for them the day they were born!   This will really help our kids grow up with confidence and a great self image!

Would you do anything to change the atmosphere in your home?  Sign up for two tips on how to get started in the box to the right!  We make it easy!

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Argue With Your Teenager This Weekend?

February 15th, 2010

Have I got a story for you!  I was talking to one of my kids the other day and really trying to help him start moving towards one of his goals.  Funny thing is I got caught in the trap that he wasn’t hearing me!  You know where we went after that don’t you?  Yep, down into the hole of no return!  We started arguing and went no where.  My husband so nicely reminded me to just walk away.  I did. 

I did not follow my rule of stating your point in 20 words or less from a couple weeks ago.  I was caught in an old habit of drilling my point all the way to the 18th hole.  Teenagers just don’t like that.  In fact, they fight back when that happens. 

The best part about this story is that about 15 minutes later I had to bring him on an errand.  My car broke down en route.  We had to sit on the side of the road until we were rescued by my husband.  I laughed with him because we were stranded in a car together after we had an argument.  So, I said my point in 20 words or less and he listened. OMG!!  REALLY??   He said his point and I listened.  YES I listened!  We were good! 

For a second, I was really mad at myself.  How can I coach you to be better parents if I fell into a very old trap.  But then I thought, WOW what a great lesson for us all.  We are not perfect and our kids do not expect us to be either.  WE should not expect them to be perfect either.  These steps we take backwards can actually propel us much faster forward.  My son and I had a laugh about it and said what we really needed to say.  He knows that I am and have been working to be a better mom and he really appreciates it.  Especially when he sees his friends treated badly. 

MORAL OF THE STORY - you never know when you are going to get stuck in the car with your kids!  Be the kind of parent your kids don’t mind getting stuck with!

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Top 10 List of ZERO Cost Ways to Spend Quality Time with your TEENS!

February 8th, 2010

Yes I said it – a top 10 list of ways you can spend time with your Teenagers that do not cost any money!  Many of my clients have a more difficult time (I even did) thinking of ways to spend time with their teens.  It is so easy when they are little.  I used to play hide and seek with my kids, legos, matchbox cars, color, paint, have a picnic or simply just chase each other.  Well, when they are older they really don’t like to color so much and they will only play hide and seek or ghost in the graveyard outside in the summer with their friends – NOT THEIR PARENTS! 

So what do you do with teens when they are older and you are under a budget?  I polled my Facebook Friends for help on this one!  Thanks for everyone’s input.  Here they are the top 10!  Great idea from Donna LaMar is to have them bring friends with too!  You will all have fun!

1.  Talk to them about the new Facebook interface!  Do they like it?

2.  Cook dinner with them and make their favorite meal or try something new

3.  When they are 16 they need 100 + hours drive time in the car (at least in Illinois).  I took my kids to lunch 1 1/2 hours away and back to get drive time. 

4.  Bring up a subject that is controversial in their mind and they will talk about it (I guarantee it - just don’t judge them at all)

5.  Teach them how to fix something at your house or have them help you paint a room or the house (my kids really got into painting our house a couple years ago)

6.  Go to a zoo or museum on the free admission day or to a local state park and explore

7. Watch a favorite TV show or movie (American Idol, Miss America Pageant, Lost, or favorite movies from the library)

8.  Play games (suggestions were Scrabble, cards, Uno, Wii and etc..)

9.  Play sports – what kind?  Well what are you into?  BMX racing, baseball, softball, football, Frisbee, badminton, volleyball, hiking, biking,  etc………

10.  Volunteer together – the local food pantry, soup kitchen, animal shelter, sending supplies to Haiti – watch the newspaper for ideas or use Google

Enjoy!  Remember kids really do enjoy spending fun times with the family.  Don’t bring up the chores or anything like that.  Make this a time where your kids can just be themselves to build their confidence.  They really need you to know this side of them because I know you think they are amazing!  Sometimes we don’t let them know enough that we know they are amazing!

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